IT'S A LADY'S THING...

As I walked down the aisle looking pure in my white gown, I saw him afar desperate and waiting to take my hand. I said to myself "he lost his job, has no house, yet I'm marrying him... I'll surprise him with keys to our new house and new car". I said those divine vows looking deep into those eyes that seemed so true. That was then. It's been a little over a year now and as it is today, this is my fourth miscarriage for him and he's been supportive till he refused to send me to the hospital last Wednesday. For a moment I thought it was a nightmare until he broke that ceramic plate my mother gave us on our traditional wedding day, and said to my face "yes! I cheated so what can you do about it?? Four (4) miscarriages, Dede, 4 miscarriages! Look at you, you are fat, won't even make an effort to lose some weight. She's better than you... In fact, I knew it was you, you are a hindrance to my progress!! Wicked woman!!!". Herh! Me? Akwele, wasn't I even fatter when he married me? Did I not get him connected at Cal Bank? Now he's making money and thinks I'm a hindrance to his progress. I curse him!! I curse that woman he cheated on me with with a double portion of my miscarriages!! She'll know no peace till she tastes a portion of this pain. Wicked man! Evil woman!! She will taste the salt in her own tears so bad she wouldn't need any in her food for over a year!"

Ei! Did he not say he liked you the way you are? Anyway, for Jnr, I gave him my all /strokes long Brazilian hair to rest behind right ear/ my time, my pride, my attention, even had to break some rules just because I loved him. And you know what, he knew I was ready to give so much yet he took me for granted... My pride for granted. Everyone thought we were the cutest couple. Ah! Akwele, didn't you make that comment some time back? /nodding/ yea... Then he started behaving... You know what I mean? So then it happened; he wanted out! Right in my face! I remember his exact words "I want out". Herh! It felt like I was suffocating, and the setting was somewhere strange bi saa! I had to meet up with him at Dansoman and he broke up with me in his car at the Dansoman filling station. Ei!! Mb33ma!! /sips a glass of coca cola with iced cubes/ And the weirdest reason was he thought he loved me but did in the beginning and didn't wanna keep hurting me...and can't work it out but have to let me go /hits hand on the counter/ kw3h! I swear I'd wanted to slap him there but God formed me to be too nice. And you know me, I understood, I let it go, but I still love him. I just love him, Akwele, I love that man but it hurts to know he doesn't.

Well, your man seems confused and unstable. I'll never cry over such a man. But seriously, he was the first guy who "knew" you?? *laughs* So who's gonna satisfy those cravings now? Awww baby girl, hmph! Just when I thought a relationship could last over 6mths... We used to get intimate all the time... Abi you know me! Even before church on sundays. We called it "pervy Sundays" /giggling/ Then I got pregnant and had to abort. As much as I loved him and was against abortion, Akwele, I was so not ready. But can you believe Nii found an excuse not to take me to the hospital for the termination? Talk of paying the bills, he contributed no cedi!! A few weeks later, he said he couldn't continue doing "us" so wanted a break up. Look at me, frustration got me eating all the time. Had to change my wardrobe. Now I'm beginning to look like Dede, no offence, Dede. /swearing/ But me Nana Yaa!! /hitting hand on her chest/ Relationships is so out of my books!

Ladies... Ladies... Ladies... I understand it wasn't an easy road for you. You're independent, learned and amazing women and I admire your strength. For all the insults and curses and even well wishes, well, I wouldn't say they deserved less. You know of my story, don't you? Yet Kofi and I are still friends. I mean, do I have an option? I'll see him virtually all the time... Life moves on. But seriously, some men are just not easy to understand even when they try to be; some are also just wicked!... Just wicked!! But hey! Raise your glasses ladies /ladies raise glasses to a toast/... This is to the past that just passed, our strength, our bond, and a new life and independence and wisdom and... /wink/