Heart's art
Beautifully craft
I see them all
Yet I want it wiped out
Please...
My life is a mess
Have I lived a lie
Maybe I just discovered less
Less of self and afraid of the rest
Pity...
Listen hard
Listen to me
The me you see is the me I give
The me I give isn't what He gave
Forgive me...
Forgive me Father for I have sinned
Not coverteousness
Not murder
Just haven't pushed harder
I realised...
Yet my fears
Slowly crawling within the walls of my heart
Wipe all out now
And paint the new art
The art that will never part from this heart
With the balance of message and form, it's a bit hard to tell on what to hit. I like that the message is pertinent (to me). I feel you should do a little more work on it; where some bits seem contrived, spell them out as you would in normal speech. This poem can take certain liberties and not stick to its form strictly. I feel it'll be more beautifully read that way. :D
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